Wednesday, 6 May 2015


The man I share my life with would be the world's worst spy. Everybody would know if he has entered a room, opened a cupboard or searched a drawer. You see, it is completely impossible for him to go into a space and leaving it exactly as he found it. He will always leave traces of himself and primarily, all doors and drawers will always remain open if he has opened them. Not only does he not see that they are left open, he also does not care.

Secondly, all things will sit on top of each other, not next to each other as they usually were. He finds it creative when he has to search for things in drawers and cupboards and do not see the need to keep things sorted. This also goes for my things.

We have come to an agreement. No, actually, I have come to an agreement. I have decided not to even try to change him. I will only change me and that change is to not care. Not carenotcarenotcare. lalala

I will quietly close cupboards and drawers as I walk past them because I want them closed. (Possibly laugh about it if he has managed to open ALL drawers at the same time.) I will re-organize my drawers and cupboards that we share (for example in the kitchen). He is the one doing the fancy cooking and consequently all fancy cooking items live in a special cupboard. This is, by me, refereed to as the chaos-cupboard. Not only do I rarely open it, on the few instances when I should put something back into it (for example after having dried dishes), I ask for his help. (Yes, he will snatch the door open, quickly toss the item in, and then close it fast so that nothing falls out.)

I look somewhere else, quietly humming lalalala

In cupboards and drawers that we do not share, such as boxes for hygiene items, my stuff is meticulously organised and his is in a jumble. How would I know if he had a headache? My hygiene drawer would be a mess after he had taken a painkiller. (We now have a shared hygiene box for items we both use. Oh yes, we do. And it is an organized jumble. I do not even sigh about it.)

I happily walk over his underwear on the floor with my shoes. Perhaps even twice. Each time he does laundry, he will come and ask if I have anything else that should be included. Each time I tell him that everything is already in the laundry basket. This has been going on for years.

I did pick him because of his creativity and he does enjoy living in an organized house. We try not to change each other too much.

However, after having been away for a month, I had a lot of cupboards and drawers to close and a lot of stuff to organize when I got back.


  1. Ahem, this is very recognizable. I wonder what would happen if I were away for a month. Would there be a system in the chaos? Or would it be chaos-upon-chaos?

  2. Zijn alle Nederlandse mannen zo?? Maybe they will start a movement of chaos and stop us for organizing things, banning the closing of doors and forcing us to never put items where they used to be. Aaaaaaahhhhhh... (woke up screaming from nightmare)

  3. Common to all couples. We have made accomodations. Since my wife still works and I don't, I do all our laundry, dishes, and keep the house clean. This makes sense, as I am here and she can only come home on weekends, since we live so far from her job and in such rough terrain. I do all of our finances and bill paying. I maintain the buildings and care for the animals. When she comes home, she can rest on the weekends. We take little day trips to places we like, and we have dinner out at our favorite restaurant.

    When she retires in five years we think we will move to Costa Rica and live near the beach.